Love A Second Time Round  
Robin W. and Brad P. - Toronto

Love A Second Time Round

My love life didn’t start with Lavalife, but circumstances along the way brought me here.

I met my soul mate at a campus pub during my second year of university. Our life together was picture perfect. We married young (23), bought a house as a young couple (25), and started our lives as parents at 26, followed closely by a second child when we were 28. We had a beautiful 11 years together – and I never dreamed of needing a service such as Lavalife.

When my husband was 30 years old he was diagnosed with Leukemia. He valiantly fought this cancer for a year but eventually succumbed to the disease. When he died I lost my partner and husband and was widowed at 31 years of age. My two children, age 2 ½ and 5 ½ lost a daddy they barely got a chance to know. I was heartbroken, stricken by grief, loneliness and fear.

Enter Lavalife. A friend recommended that I try online dating so I would have a chance to get out in the world again. My goal was merely to meet people, distract myself from the grind of working life, and try to find a moment to smile despite the events of the past. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would ever have a chance to start over. I wasn’t looking for love; I was looking to not be sad – if only for a few hours at a time.

I posted a personal profile on Lavalife and decided to be upfront and honest about being a young, single mother of two children. I proudly positioned myself as a ‘package’ deal. Within days of registering, I had countless smiles, emails and invitations to chat. I met a variety of individuals on the site but one caught my attention immediately. I’d love to say it was his charming wit that grabbed me, but to be honest, he had a gorgeous smile, seemed easy going and was as interested as I was in meeting someone, sharing a meal and enjoying a date with no strings attached. After two weeks of talking online, we agreed to meet for dinner on Valentine’s Day.

Brad was the first person I met on Lavalife. From the very beginning, Brad knew my 'story'. By the time I agreed to meet him in person, he knew about my late husband, the names of my kids, and the fact that I was skeptical about the online dating scene. We hit it off from day one. He was exactly as he described (although a good two inches shorter than he claimed ) and he accepted me without hesitation. He respected my boundaries, and welcomed my children into his life with open arms. Little did I know that 2 weeks of emails with a stranger I met online would lead me to a 'second' life, every bit as sweet as the first.

Brad and I were married, as a family, after a year and a half together. He was a father to my children before they even thought to say 'dad' while all the while knowing that he shared this role with another man who couldn't be there in person.

In January 2007, Brad and I welcomed one last addition to our family. Named after my first husband, Dryden James is a constant reminder of how a little determination, belief in happy endings and some blind faith can lead to incredible results. Not only did I meet the second love of my life through Lavalife but I met the man who healed the broken hearts of my whole family and made us all believe in love a second time round.